Every Moment

Recently, I performed with the Ms. Connecticut Senior America organization at nursing homes and memory loss centers in Connecticut. Stepping into each facility was like entering an alternate universe, where the world I knew disappeared the moment I crossed the threshold. There were, of course, a variety of personalities on display. Some residents were cheerful, even if their lives were confined to the walls of a nursing home. Some were sad and didn’t hesitate to share their battles with loneliness or depression. And some were downright angry, with no filter between their emotions and their words. All understandable, given the overwhelming losses—personal, physical, and situational—that they were living with.

But what struck me, every single time, was the kindness of the staff. Having grown up with parents who owned and operated a nursing home, I’m acutely aware of how hard it is to face each day with patience and compassion, especially when the residents aren’t always on their best behavior. It takes a special kind of person to do this work.

The holiday songs and dances we performed were, frankly, nothing compared to the joy I got from interacting with the residents and staff. It was an afternoon of small community—a moment that would never be repeated in exactly the same way again. And, as is often the case after these experiences, I was left with a few thoughts:

• Be grateful for the moments when we have the luxury of choice—whether it’s deciding what to make for dinner or how to spend a few hours of free time. The days when we don’t need someone else to help us, when we have a sliver of independence, are gifts.
• Be grateful for health—in body, mind, and spirit. I try to remember this when faced with any limitation, whether it’s a cold or something more serious. It’s helpful to think about how I want to be seen during times of illness or injury, and then act accordingly.
• Reach out beyond your own sphere. You don’t have to wear a costume and belt out “Santa Baby” to share a little kindness. Opportunities are everywhere, often in the most unexpected places. But if those opportunities happen to involve a personal gift, something you’ve let gather dust in a drawer, perhaps now’s the time to revisit how you’re reaching out. After all, a new year is here—and it’s the perfect time to make a fresh start.